2/1/25 - Picking Up with A House of Pots’ Closure - Pottery and Plants for Sale  

Hello there.

I’m Ian, the proprietor of A House of Pots, this house you see filled to the brim with plants and pots. Odds are that you might be asking, “what the heck is going on here?”

Well, you silly goose, I’ve got goods for sale and it’d be good on you to come and get some:

A House of Pots

1620 w 74th way Denver CO 80221

Fridays through Sunday (for now)

From 12 to 6

It’s been awhile since I’ve been active with sales posts like these, so let me get you up to speed with all things A House of Pots. 

You’ve probably heard that A House of Pots is the home of low, low prices, but perhaps you also heard that there’s a closure coming in my future. 

Both of these things are true. 

Let me explain, but first, if there’s some specific information you’d like to obtain, reach me online or by phone if it’s germane:

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@ahouseofpots

1) A House of Pots is one-of-one, a place that can’t be outdone, who competes directly with opposition much bigger than me. You might have heard of some of stores that yours truly goes toe-to-toe with:

Harm Depot, Blows, Y’all Mart, Lil’ Tim Tim’s Ceramified Pottery Doohickies, Dillard’s 

I was put on this earth to battle billion dollar corporations with best in market pottery, both in terms of quality and selection, and the lowest prices as well. Everyone else, from local plant shops to garden centers, Little Becky flipping pots on F’Book Marketplace, and that one dude at the farmer’s market; they aight, but not really what I call competition. 

You’re welcome to buy from them, and they’re welcome to purchase wholesale from me, but we’re simply on other levels. 

They can’t compete on price. They don’t hold 20,000 pots. They don’t got ops or connects. They don’t unload semi trucks with they bare hands. They don’t throw hands with the best of them. 

They might sell plants, but they don’t intentionally lose money on them. That’s right, at A House of Pots, in the pursuit of low, low prices, we will sell plants at prices lower than we should, intentionally losing money, so that you can get more for the same dollar than you normally could. 

Come ask how A House of Pots offers up to 50% off your plants. Or why people with plant related tattoos get free succulents. 

2) Something I have to address is whether A House of Pots is actually closing. 

A House of Pots, is, in fact, closing — its flagship location at the aforementioned address. 

Closure is inevitable, but I won’t be needing any closure in this fact, as the business isn’t closing, just the namesake commercial property that looks like a home located at:

1620 w 74th way Denver CO 80221

If you’ve always wanted to check out what’s going on here, do; but make it sooner than later, because the pots won't always be here. 

The “will he, won’t he” saga is coming to an end, but, in the end, all good things don’t have to come to an end. 

I agonized over coming to terms with insurmountable odds and county bureaucracy that really doesn’t care about small business, but, in my darkest hour, when I had finally admitted defeat and there were no more moves to make, the pottery gawds smiled upon me and blessed me with good fortune. 

This was almost a year ago and in the time since I’ve sold a lot of pots, paid off my property, built up a lot of inventory, and figured out there’s not much I can do to make it work and keep working out my North Denver location. 

So I’ll be relocating. 

Where? I’m not sure.

I tell people somewhere near Broncos Stadium. 

When?

It’s going to be in the Summer; likely in July. 

Why don’t I just make the move now?

There are many reasons, but the largest are that it’s quite affordable to operate out of a paid off property and I don’t want to uproot right before the Spring when years of legacy customers come looking for me to fulfill their gardening needs. 

I tend to a lot of gardeners. 

Well why am I relocating at all?

County regulation stipulates that I cannot store inventory outdoors overnight. This is critical to my way of business, so I’ve got to go. 

But where will A House of Pots go?

A House of Pots isn’t going anywhere, figuratively, but it’ll be central in Denver, near a freeway, with even more space for pots. An industrial warehouse is a good guess. A big yard space would be great. A high dock to unload trucks is a must, but level entry for people who can’t do stairs is as well. I have a few areas in mind, but be sure to tell me where you’d like to see me go. 

And if you’re a landlord, a property manager, or have a hot lead on a property that would be a great location, be sure to let me know. 

But didn’t this post say free on it? All you wanted was some free stuff and here you are reading away, wasting your life, and you just want that free sh!t. 

Alright, alright. Calm down my man. I’ll tell you about the free stuff. 

In addition to selling terracotta pots for $0.50 to $15, handmade mexican pottery for $10 to $150ish, glazed planters for $5 to $100, and plants like pothos, philodendron, monstera, succulents, christmas cactus, money trees, dracaena, dieffenbachia, hoya, ficus, and tradescantia for $4 to $25 on average, I do indeed give away free things, like:

More words to read

Pottery jargon

Clippings

Cuttings

Small amounts of soil

Potting services

Broken pots

Pottery shards

Occasional rooted propagations

Nursery pots when available 

Pallets

Advice

Hugs

Information as to the whereabouts and current aliases of a one Rudy Valdez

Help loading your car

Cash discounts

Recommendations on plant shops near you

Terracotta pots for kids

Potted succulents for plant tattoos 

Slow motion broken pot videos

Resin pots

In case you’re smokin that res and didn’t understand a thing I said, I’ll say it all again:

I sell pottery and plants. My prices are coming for the competition’s bottom line. The bottom line is that I’m relocating, not closing my business. 

Another point I want to point out is the anatomy of my post titles. Let’s look at this most recent one for example:

“2/1/25 - Picking Up with A House of Pots’ Closure - Pottery and Plants for Sale”

Each title has three points; a timestamp, the tag line, a clarificatory statement 

“2/1/25”

What is 2/1/25 you might ask? What is 2 for 1 for 25? “I don’t understand”, you might say. 

It’s a date, not an offer. 2/1/25 can also be written as February 1st, 2025. It’s the date the post was published. All my sales post titles lead with a timestamp. It’s how you can tell when the post was from, whether it’s old, and what the store looked like on that date. 

I’d say this is the most important part of the title. If the timestamp is from six months ago or more, there’s a chance the item you saw in the post, particularly a plant, might no longer be available.That’s ok, because I’m always bringing in great new plants and pots to catch your eye.

If the date is recent, say, today, which only happens once, then there’s a good chance everything shown is still in stock. 

“ - Picking Up with A House of Pots’ Closure - ” 

The second section of my post titles is usually the tagline or hook. Maybe it’ll be the theme of the post, a joke, double entendre, or a statement that hopefully encourages viewers to click the lead image and read what follows. 

In this specific case, “picking up” was meant to allude to you coming to the store to purchase product, but also signify that I would be continuing upon previously expressed notions that the store was closing. There’s often a lot going on in my sentences, or very little at all, which is funny coming from the guy who previously grammatically skewered the statement “[e]veryone else … they aight, but not really what I call competition” on purpose. 

You can always count on an A House of Pots post to play with the reader and leave them asking, “what the fcuk did I just witness” or “what the fcuk kind of business is ‘Lil’ Tim Tim’s Ceramified Pottery Doohickies’ and I wonder if they have good reviews?”

“Pottery and Plants for Sale”

This is a clarificatory statement. Because there’s a lot going on in an A House of Pots post, it’s understandable that a hopeful plant parent might overlook all the sales narrative and become confused to discover upon outreach that everything pictured is for sale and not free for the taking. 

“What do you mean you want money for these things that you clearly paid for? You’re saying that it’s not all for free?”

That’s exactly what I’m saying. I bought these things to sell them to others. I do give away some things to customers or would be customers, but it’s a fairly limited list of things I’ll do this with. Feel free to review the list of free items listed above to determine if any of these free things are the things that you’re looking for. 

I make a point to point out that I sell pottery and plants in the title and throughout the post so as to set expectations for readers that I sell these things and that it’s not all for free. 

“But why would you list the post for FREE if everything shown isn’t free,” a freeloading freeloader might ask freely. 

It’s simple. Because I give away free items and services and thereby the lowest priced aspect of this sales post is zero dollars. 

There’s more to it than that, which we can get into personally in person when you bring your persons to my personal place of business to peruse my wares, whereupon I’ll tell all my secrets and strategies for converting online traffic into real world sales. 

Did somebody mention FREE though, because here’s some of that free pottery jargon that the free list mentioned:

(Pottery jargon is a randomized list of keywords and search terms sewn into somewhat nonsensical statements to boost the searchable visibility or SEO of my posts. To demonstrate this concept, I’ll lead with one or two sentences that exemplify this concept and then leave the remainder of my assorted garden gobbledygook undigested as a testament to this approach.)

Looking for pots near me in the Westminster area but nowhere near Greeley? Excellent, because I’m the pottery shop near me with the planters that Longmont, Lakewood, and Northglenn seek. 

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*** I understand this was long. I didn’t try to keep it short. Normally, I don’t. I won’t take up much more of your time. The time is coming to close my shop, but not my business. Make it your business to take the time for a short visit because you understand this location won’t be here for very long. ***