I’m trying to get paid, bro. That’s why I brought in all these San Pedro. 

You know, the San Pedro is a mystical plant fabled in lore across the globe for generations. 

While its healing powers are up for debate, there’s no debate these chonky little columnar cacti will outgrow their pots and grow in your hearts quicker than most of your plant children. 

Kids and grown plant enthusiasts alike love the San Pedro because they’re easy to care for (just give it lots of light), have small spikes that simply scratch rather than maim, and add height to any photosynthetic arrangement. 

These trichocereus pachanoi cost between $45 to $55 per on a large plant and $20-$25 on smaller starts. 

But wait, there's more. I, Ian of A House of Pots, happen to sell lots of different plants and pots.

They’re all located at:

A House of Pots

1620 W 74th Way, Denver, CO 80221

Hours: Sat & Sun 11-6

I'll explain the my other plants, pottery, and free items in a moment, but feel free to contact me with any questions at:

<< 909 >> << 744 >> << 7708 >>

- or -

@ahouseofpots

Regarding those pots, I’ve got lots. Big, little, medium, round, blue, ceramic, terracotta, turtle, yes, I’m running the gamut. These glazed ceramics and red clay planters range between $1 and $150, but for the most part are $5 to $60. 

There’s So Many Wayz (a Quik bit of foreshadowing) for you to get pottery that’s glazed at A House of Pots. In truth, it’s the pottery, not the plants, nor the San Pedro, that’s my plan to get paid, though.  

Believe me bro, ain't no need to tell the po-po, I do sell San P and easy, low maintenance houseplants on the low, low. $10 to $60 covers most succulents, monstera, ZZ plants, snake plants, spider plants, various cacti, pothos, and so so. 

Now you might be thinking, didn’t I see that there were free things? Can’t I get a free San Pedro?

No.

There are free things and services, but no free San Pedro. And if you threaten to block me or tattle on me to the Internet police, don’t forget that all the snitches get the fo-fo.

Now here we come again with a brand new twist, en garde. I offer:

Free potting services

Free broken pottery

Free plant clippings

Free rescue plants (while supplies last)

Free resin planters

Free DJ Quik lyrics

Free pallets (while supplies last)

Free nursery planters  (while supplies last)

Free discounts

Free hookups for Google Reviews and social shares

Free pottery jargon

I rock the pottery jargon like this:

With so many ways to get paid with a pottery shop near me and pottery near me. I hustle for days to get that vegetable box at the Erie plant store near me. The tenth of the month I spend my government aid on cactus, ceramics, delivery to Parker, and plant stand from the pottery store near me. Greeley, Golden, Superior, Littleton, Denver, Aurora, Westminster Fort Collins, Federal Heights, Commerce City, and the used-to-be-crooks grow aloe from my pottery shop so I'm puttin’ money on my books. We shook up the world with porcelain at garage sale prices for you, tree, succulent or three, and cacti calling for red clay pottery. See, I did it for my partner, our son and my daughter; and you don't have to be no baller to kick it with me Loveland, Centennial, Wheat Ridge, Lakewood, Arvada, Longmont, Brighton, Thornton, or Northglenn. See, I stay real, G with the pots near me, forever feedin the free fiendin’ punk hoes in Broomfield, Boulder, Castle Rock, Louisville online misery.

So many ways to plant a philodendron planter (I can get busy)

So many ways to pot trees in gardens instead of climbing, fishing, or hiking (I gots to get the scrilly)

So many ways to make your house a green greenhouse (We can have a mardi-gras)

So many ways to add cement stoneware for garden plants (Cause I can rock the party y'all)

So many ways to plant shop for monstera plants near me (Tell me can ya feel it — Ian)

So many ways to buy mcm terracotta pots and then plants (I gots to make the dividends)

So many ways for a gardener gardening to buy ceramic planters without pottery barn prices (You know I keep it real — Ian)

So many ways

So many ways

So many ways

So many ways that I’m trying to get san paid, bro. 

<< This FREE pottery jargon was brought to you by DJ Quik in So Many Wayz >>

A Quik recap:

This isn’t  DJ Quik, and, quite frankly, I think my shop and San Pedros gotta be for some of the baddest ma’fks that that ever fucked with Colorado plants or rap music. Cause this post right here is on some old cool sh!t. 

If you don't believe me, just give me three and a half seconds and I'll show you.

You ready?

*** A House of Pots: The Home of Low, Low, Prices and Your Future San Pedro *** 

(Press play on the the video below & re-read jargon again)

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